Brain Wave!

Last night as I was trying to go to sleep I came up with a brilliant idea for a movie. We combine all the Jaws movies (Jaws, Jaws 2, Jaws 3D and Jaws 4: The Revenge) and make them into one huge megamovie. 'Yes, good enough,' you say, but WAIT, that isn't even the brilliant part! 'Holy shit!' you say! Yes! We make the movie from the point of view of the sharks!

Yes! Imagine this: you see, the movies are based on the premise of a killer shark, then the 'relative' of the killer shark gets revenge, so the new movie would be all about the sharks and their family life.

Here is a sample scene, stay with me here:

The scene is underwater (obviously), one large female shark addresses a younger, adolescent shark

Mother shark: where have you been?

Jaws: Out.

MS: Are you hungry? You look hungry.

J: No, I'm ine.

MS: Let me fix you a little something.

J: Mo-om!

MS: Just a little something, you're skin and bones! Look, it's no bother, it's ready, see? Go on, have some!

J: Mom! I said I wasn't hungry!

MS: Well then (swims off for a minute) Well, you'll never guess who I ran into today? Who do you think it was? You'll never guess, you'll never guess! It was the funniest thing...

FADE OUT.

Amazing, eh?

So then the whole spree of violent shark attacks are clearly due to Jaws's frustration with his mother. Then Chief Brody kills Jaws, and in the next film, his mother tries to get revenge because she is wracked with guilt.

It has a few glitches that need to be ironed out, but brilliant, n'est-ce pas?

The REAL Problem as I see it is Jaws 4, (in which cheeky bloke Michael Caine teaches lonely Widow Brody to love again, and battles shark) because it takes place in the Carribean. Well, no fear, I'll work it out.

Gold!

Outrageous!

So this weekend Daniel and I had The Best Curry... EVER. We went to Mother India's Cafe and literally got loopy with joy because it was so good. It felt like we were high, but not paranoid or anything, just really giggly. Maybe they slipped something into our naan.

They serve their curries in small tapas portions, so you can get a good variety of dishes without feeling all gross and weighed down. We got saag paneer, lamb patina (which was lamb with mint and other spices) and lamb musulum (which was lamb with okra and ginger and things). It was ridiculously good. They brought us the saag paneer first and we tasted it, and yes, it was delicious... then they brought the lamb patina, and we tasted it, and it was amazing... THEN they brought the other lamb, and we tasted it and it was even better than the other one, so we were really excited. THEN they brought the Peshwari naan: it was insane. Daniel tasted it and his face sort of lit up and he gave me a bite and it was like nothing I have ever had. It was nice and crispy and warm, but also sweet and buttery and had coconut in it. Now, normally, I don't hold with no coconut, but this was NUTrageous!

So, we sort of whispered to each other and giggled and drifted off into a Zen-like state of eating. It was one of the best meals I have ever had.

This makes me want to try and make a Top 10 list of best meals I have ever had. This will be really difficult. But I will give it a try. Most of them will eb the first time I had that particular dish, or went to that restaurant, so that might not be so hard, but for other meals- homecooked- it may be more difficult. But this is damn important, so I shall try.

Okay, in no particular order:

1) meal at Mother India's Cafe
2) first time I ate at Tierras Colombianas
3) Thanksgiving dinner 2 years ago at home- it was Thansgiving at its best, y'all!
4) First time I ate a dragon roll at Blue Ribbon Sushi- supposedly it has gone downhill, but the first time I went (in 1997 maybe?) it was amazing
5) Dinner I had at Le Chameleon in Paris with my mom. This restuarant closed a few months after we went, which is so sad, because it was so good, and the people were so nice, and they gave us free glasses of wine.
6) first time I ate a falafel from Kebab Cafe, and also honey cake... but that wasn't the same meal... but I think it can count as one
7) First time Elnie made me tuna salad sandwich. No joke, fools, it was good. On french bread, I believe it was, with a Diet Coke. Terribly OBVIOUS I am sure, but hells delish. Maybe she will bring some to the wedding, it a plastic bag... hummm, that sounds a bit dodgy.
8) First time I had a Nutella crepe in France when I was 12. It was ridiculously good and I think I could have eaten them every day I was there.
9) Almost any of the pizza I had when in Rome (ha! when in rome...), but esp. that place baffeto? Is that the name? Where was that? I can picture it, and it was really good.
10) First hamburger I ate after a lapse of 4 or 5 years, and *gasp* it was at the Feve. Madness.

So, there must be more, and there is, but this is a good Top 10 I think. Bravo!

Daniel doing his chores 

Green Glasgow! No snow anywhere! 

Our new table. It extends! 

Sarah and holly! ha! 

My basset friend 

BISSSSCUIIITTTT! 

Swan and voyeur swan 

Yay!

Another yogurt miracle: hazelnut yogurt!

This weekend Daniel's friend Naomi and her fiance Robin came to visit. Since all I talk about is food, I was mentioning how much I like rhubarb yogurt, and Robin mentioned hazelnut yogurt and I knew I must try it.

and now I have, and it is delicious. So good!!! It is not too sweet, and has bits of hazelnut in it.

So... yeah, that's basically all I have been up to: eating yogurt.

Daniel and I went to Victoria Park, out in the west end, so I will put up some photos of that. It was really nice.

A Whale of a Tale

Ha! A whale is swimming up the Thames!

http://www.guardian.co.uk/uk_news/story/0,,1691203,00.html

A bottle-nosed whale is swimming up the Thames. madness. Imagine if a whale swam up the Hudson, the East River, or even somehow busted into (shudder) the Gowanus Canal. It is so cool. I bet Tony Blair is going to go and ride it, a la that little girl in Whale Rider. Then everyone will realize that he is the true embodiment of the mystical powers of goverment and he will be Prime Minister forever! And the whale will be Chancellor of the Exchequer, or it will be queen.

Hm, there's another movie in there somewhere. Or at least a really powerful made-for-tv movie.

Wait, there is more

I forgot some songs. Oops. They also played

There's Too Much Love
The Loneliness of a Middle Distance Runner (I love that one)
To Be Myself Completely
White Collar Boy

Man, I wish I could see them again. Now I will have to content myself with mem'ries. Sigh.

Wrap Up

Dude, O-KAY! Elnie needs to calm down, a chill pill is in order.

Anyway, the Belle and Sebastian show was great. They were in fine form! Some old faves were played:

Stars of Track and Field
Mayfly
Fox in the Snow
Seeing Other People
Sleep the Clock Around
Dog on Wheels
Your Cover's Blown
Me and the Major
Electronic Renaissance
I'm A Cuckoo
She's Losing It

and some from the new album (which is brilliant, btdubz)

Funny Little Frog
Another Sunny Day
Sukie in the Graveyard
Dress Up In You

Aw, it was so good. The crowd was kind of obnoxious, and we were standing behind two girls who spent most of the time commenting (very LOUDLY) on how cute Stuart was. I mean, we KNOW it's true, so just cool your heels. They actually commented on the relative cuteness of everyone in the band (execpt Sarah- poor girl) and then went on to talk about one of their ex-boyfriends, who was there.

Anyway, we felt really bad for B&S at first, because they weren't getting much of a reaction from the crowd and you could tell they were getting a bit bitter and confused. It seemed that people weren't really that bothered about seeing them. Poooo! Idiots! But eventually it warmed up a bit and they brought some people on stage to clap along- which was a huge mistake. There was one drunk girl up there who was in danger of taking somebody out with her flailing arms.

All in all, it was really good and I wnat to see them again. The new songs sounded really good as did the old ones, of course. And Stuart's dancing was amazing and adorable, of course.
Happy now, E-Dog?

!!!!!

An amazing quote from Natural World tv show on BBC2:

"It's time for another sun-drenched lesson in naturalist fieldcraft."

Today on Radio 4

Rare Steeds: The Highland Pony!

This was a great show. I may have to listen to it again on the internet (www.bbc.co.uk/radio4). Very informative.

Tomorrow the series continues...


Rare Steeds: The uses of Fell and Dale ponies throughout history.

THROUGHOUT HISTORY! That's a lot of material to cover.

Tonight Daniel ( I shall call him Hubs 2 B from here on out, or H2B) and I are going to see Belle and Sebastian! I am so excited, I cannot contain my excitement!!!

My favorite line...

There comes a time in every mystery/detective show when the cops are invesitgating the crime scene and one of them calls to another,

"Lieutenant, you better come take a look at this."

Now, it doesn't have to be a Lieutenant. Captain, Detective, whatever, it works. The point is: it ALWAYS happens. By now, wouldn't you think they would just say,

"Yep, again." or something of the sort.

Then again, by the same token, wouldn't Dr. Mark Sloan realize by now that EVERYONE he hangs out with is capable of homicide? I mean, he is risking his life every day, any of his so-called friends (and occasionally family) might try to take him out at any moment. As Elnie pointed out, it seems like everyone- childhood friends, distant cousins, babysitter, mimes- are hardened criminals, so WHY does he keep hanging out with them?

I think he totally gets off on it.

Ew. I am so sorry.

Think of something pure and cheerful, like little puppies romping in a green meadow.

Rhubarb rhubarb!

I have found a new companion: rhubarb yogurt. It is delicious! Not to sweet, not too tart, lovely and creamy. I think it might be the best yogurt flavor I have ever had! Zounds, is this possible? I thought that Stoneyfield Farm's blackberry and coffee flavors had it sewed up. Think again!

The question is: can I buy it by the gallon?

My new best friend 

Murder, She Wrote

Since my foot is swollen I have a good excuse to stay indoors (and it is such bad weather outside too)and watch Murder, She Wrote which is set in Hawaii this time.

At first when it began I thought we would be confronted by the sight of Angela Lansbury in a swimsuit- saints alive! But no, she is just in a modest fuschia tunic and espadrilles or something.

I have never been a huge fan of MSW, but I admit that I am getting pretty into it these days. Is that sad?

Anyway, this one is all about political intrigue and family ties. Brilliant. If only I could get a piece of the action.

Rachel Whiteread installation at the Tate: really pretty cool 

Back in Glasgow, the purple bag is trying to eat our apartment, starting with me. 

Stew Lane: it is such sweet poetry 

London Bridge and my gigantic purple bag, dawrfing even the bridge itself 

Here I am by a bookstore! LONDON! 

Daniel and Sean and his wig-like hair 

London!

So, before I start on London, the macaroni and cheese turned out well, but may have been the most unhealthy thing I have ever made or eaten. It oozed delicious cheesy goodness and it may have shortened our lives by a few years each.

On Friday afternoon Daniel called to say he had gotten Monday off and we should have a little trip- and lo, we were off to Lodnon at the ungodly hour of 7 am the next morning.

We had a great time, we hung out with his friends Sean and Jamie and their respective lady friends, Halida and Sanna. We drank beer, und wine und more wine.

We went to the British Museum in the afternoon when we arrived, and it was fucking massive. Massive and full of looted antiquities and such... brilliant remnants of the EMPIRE.

We walked along the Thames to the Parliament and then met up with Daniel's friends and had a lovely time and then stumbled home to our (cheap as shit) little hotel in Islington for a nice sleep.

The next day was rainy and nasty, and we were a bit hung over. After some nice coffee and a not so nice sandwich we went ot the National Gallery, which was AWESOME. Then we limped (I hurt my foot at some point and am now a bit gimpy) to Daniel's auntie's house where we stayed last night. Then this morning we slept really late and then went to see St. Paul's Cathedral and then took an unexpected detour via London Bridge on our way to the Tate Modern, which was pretty cool.

All in all, I liked London a lot and I WILL go back, but it is- as expected- insanely expensive. But the streets have some great names, there are some good things to eat and to see and people sound liek they do in old American movies about England. Aw roight, guv'nor! Ha!

Mac und Cheese

I have been tempted by the Dining section of the New York Times to try and make macaroni and cheese tonight. I have never made the real thing, I have had brushes with Annie's Shells and Cheese, Kraft Macaroni and Cheese and even EasyMac (Elnie, can you back me up on how wrong this is?) and I am ready for the real thing. I think I will make only 1/2 the recipe, since it's just me and Daniel. So, I am writing this now so that I can have witnesses (i.e., the three people who read my blog) and I will let you know how it turns out.

I am tempted to also make cookies, but I have none of the ingredients... it is telling that I have all the ingredients for mac and cheese- 9,000,000 pounds of cheese. It just goes to show how well suited I am for this cheese-friendly country.

Okay, more to come.

The New Year begins...

and our new digital camera gets its first day out. I can now bust a move and post photos, obviously. It's pretty cool, eh?

Good thing that there were many willing posers (hmm, poseurs?) willing to put on funny hats.

Methinks that 2006 will be the year of the photoblog. Niall has flickr, elnie has an mfa and I have a lot of time on my hands, so BLADOW!

Anyway, enjoy.

Aileen is secretly Charles De Gaulle! Another undercover Frenchie unmasked. 

Fraser lunching at his club 

Note the sinister reflections in the window! 

Fraser, Bob and Daniel plan their attack on Glasgow 

Sarah Freeman: Ace Detective 

Mffrggh!

Oy. Since yesterday I was too incapacitated to write a New Year entry, it will have to happen today. So, pretend it is Jan. 1.

Happy New Year! 2006 promises to be The Best Year Yet... word on the street is that it will rock.

Hats off to Niall and his lovely apartment for such a fun party. I don't even remember the last time I robot danced like that, or when I last had the sense to refuse whiskey like that, or the last time I ate so many bags of crisps... oh wait that happens all the time.

But now that I know where Niall lives, just try and keep me away. More to the point, now that I know where he keeps his kinky wrasslin' masks, I will broadcast it to the world! But anyway, it was fun- loads of. Yesterday was a complete write-off. Daniel and I watched Mary Poppins and ate cheese on toast and then ate some Thai red curry (as usual).

Today feels much more real and less fraught with danger. We may even leave the house, or take a shower. Huzzah!