Heat Wave!

Hi y'all.

Whhheeeeee-hew! It's hot in herrr, and all I can think of is how I need to be as friggin cool as poss. It's a total no-brainer, I just need to let it all hang out and be free to be me, y'know?




WOOF! Hells yeah. The fact is that I am not only so hairy I could pass for the drain of a yeti's shower, but my collection of fine firearms and guee-tars just ups my fuck-ability, non? Yes, it is as I thought. Let's open up a tube of Pringles and see where the evening takes us.

But freals, peeps. It is warm up in this mug. It's a good day for THE BEACH:



Bwaaaaaaaahhhahahaha! Who didn't see that one coming? Really? Blind ass mofo. If you KNEW me by now you would have clocked that shit YEARS ago. More fool you.

Anywayz, being in the office during these hotter days just makes me itch. I need a job where I can be out and about, serving the community, while indulging my love of cats... yes, I said it. I do like those little shits, even if they scare the fuck out of me when they look deep into my eyes... judging me.

So, with my usual go-getter attitude, I now have it made in the shade. Here I am on my morning rounds:



Peep the tee, man. And the mom jeans. Or are they dad jeans? I'm feeling ambiguous.

Love me.

Coolio

One of the best things about the internet is how many pictures of Coolio there are:

Making something tasty:



Doffing his cap:




Sweating it out while clinging to a mother figure for whom he has the utmost love and respect:



Wondering how he wound up dressed as a transformer:



And the list goes ON! I mean it. Pages and fucking pages. Check it out. I've got bigger fish to fry.

Trying to decide how to feel about this:




Let's talk soon.

Get a slice

Peeps, my passion for pizza persists, no matter what type of shit the pencil pusher down at city hall try to pull to turn me off:




That's right. I'm 110% ready for pizza 150% of the time. That may equal some sloppy shit, but fuck if I can do the math... I'm up to my elbows in PIE!

Um, not sure what just happened there, but it ended pretty ugly.

My apologies.... after all:



I'm just me!

Yo yo

This about sums it all up.

I too have come to the realisation that I just do not have the same passion for my job as I have for making and distributing tacos...