Yet again

I am FORCED to be the one to remind people just how FUCKING MENTAL Donald Sutherland looks.



I know, people. It's old fucking news, but guess what: that does not make it any less real... nor does it make his DEVIL FACE any less scary. My nightmare last night about crows taking over my childhood home is NOTHING in the face of Donald 'Demonic Professor' Sutherland.



What the fuck does he care? Look at the man. He may as well be the INSPIRATION for Ghost Rider, people. But they had to tone that shit DOWN because the real deal was too much for the viewing public. I can just picture him on set, advising Nicholas Cage and eating the tiny hands of little babies like popcorn... tossing back his Scarf of Fear and running his hand through his manic Ghost Mane.

Proof fucking positive that Bealzebub guides this man's hand is his appearance in Aging Comedic Shambles (alternatively titled SPACE COWBOYS).



Rahhh! My face is melting!!!! It's like the first time I dropped acid and the wood grain in my friend's dorm room became Alex Trebek... I am sure Donald was lurking in there somewhere as well and I can only praise Jeebus that he did not appear, cause I KNOW that shit would have put me over the edge.



WHO LET THIS HAPPEN? Who could have brought this unholy terror down on our heads??? Lucifer himself? No, just Clint FUCKING Eastwood,of course. Because how could we be expected to LIVE without CLINT weighing in with some majestic fucktard tale of old men getting it up (or NOT) in space... starring every flaccid paunchy bastard available... (imagine the jowls shaking as they take off- the bags udner Tommy Lee Jones's eyes alone are big enough to carry all the sorrows of the world) EXCEPT for Robert Duvall and Michael Caine, who were perhaps too busy whittling, spitting and drinking moonshine in Secondhand EFFING Lions.

Sigh. I just cannot fucking win. It makes me want to throw in the towel... ESPECIALLY when I see that not ONLY did fucking Space Cowboys get made... but there is also a MAKING OF SPACE COWBOYS. Yes, people. The Making OF. Because every intricate DETAIL of this fucking EPIC space saga MUST be documented. With commentary by Jay Leno.

I have no more words.