Last Day

It is here. At last. My final day here at work.

And what am I doing? WELL... get this. Idea for a fucking amazing pizza place. It will be called Good King Wenceslas and the tag line will be 'Deep and Crisp and Even.'

LOVE IT? I know, me too.

But anyway, what could possibly mess with my good mood on this day of days? Oh, I DON'T KNOW... maybe a little something called THIS SHIT!



How did it come to pass that JIM BELUSHI was able to fucking break into the bizzzzzz and prepetrate such crimes as 'K-9' (saw it in theaters, people. Dark times. WHY is it a Komedy Klassic to have movies about dogs watching people have sex????) and 'Taking Care of Business'??? Wait, who the hell am I kidding? Taking Care of Business fucking ROCKS:

'Jimmy Dworski is a criminal serving the last 48 hours of a jail sentence. He wins a couple of baseball tickets by calling a radio quiz show. With help of other inmates, he escapes to go watch the game. When by chance he finds the filofax of executive Spencer Barns who looses it while traveling on a business weekend. Jimmy finds cash, credit cards and the key to a big mansion. He jumps on the opportunity and starts posing as Barns. While the real Barnes is trying to find his filofax he gets in all sorts of trouble. How will things turn out when the two finally meet? '

I mean, he fucking PULLS it off, dude!




Every time I fucking try to hang ten on the hood of a moving luxury vehicle, I get nasty bruises, but Belushi carries it off with such panache! Not to mention the film features my very favorite grey-skinned man (whatever he touches dies) CHARLES GRODIN. Seriously, how good was he trying to woo Miss Piggy in (the best fucking Muppet film of all) The Great Muppet Caper. It's a heist film... WITH MUPPETS! Muppppppetsssssss.

Oh my god... I am sorry. I have to. My hands are twitching. I can't stop myself:



I know, so wrong. Will you forgive me? Can will still be pals? No? This is really it, eh? Well, I suppose it's for the best. We'd only wind up hating each other in the end.

Never forget, I loved you once.