Dude

Have you missed me? I have missed you. NOT that I haven't been busy: swimming down at the river, picking blueberries, reading fucking DILBERT everyday- because I have to, ditto Garfield. This morning the whole joke was that Jon fucking ARBUCKLE had bought Garfield some new SHOES. Good god, people. Good god.

I have come to realize that it is basically still the 90s here in Vermont. For real people. In VT people are still really seriously listening to 'One Headlight' by the Wallflowers. I know. It's hard. It's been one the radio not once, not twice, but THRICE since I have been here. Heavy rotation. Same with this little band called ROXETTE. Little song called 'Joy Rde', maybe you've HEARD OF IT? It's amazing my ears have not started to bleed.

Also, in a moment of REAL boredom (it's been raining a bit) I was reading the Yellow Pages for the area (I am not even kidding) and was amazed to find the following categories:

Pig Roast
Doughnuts
Meditation
Holistic Enemas
Natural Cremation

Yes, almost a whole page devoted to each. Man, I have hit rock bottom. I found some weird yellow concealer make up in a drawer and put it all over my face to see what it would be like if I had JAUNDICE.

Not pretty.

Day after tomorrow I go back down to New York. Pray the rain stops before then or I may start cutting my own hair again.