What's Up, Bitches!

What? Oh, yes, that IS Lumpen Everyman Kevin Pollack. Who else? You may remember him from Grumpy Old Men and The Usual Suspects. He is the classic B List Celebrity, not v. memorable. Unlike this little pricless nugget of madness:



Wow! Who's that guy? Is he famous? NO, he's just some ass who has pasted his face onto the body of a dancing elf. Famously fucking worthy of a violent death, maybe, but not famous in that Brad Pitt way. Not even famous in the Kevin Pollack way.

That said, is it better to paste you face on the body of a dancing elf for the amusement of yourself and others... OR to just, say, dress up as an elf in a totally half-assed way when you duck outside of the grocery store to call your wife and tell here there is NO WAY IN HELL YOU ARE BUYING HER TAMPAX. Because there is NOTHING more humiliating than standing at the checkout, paying for femal hygiene products. NOTHING. This man is taking a stand. No fucking Tampax here, bro. This guy is keeping his dignity.



Whoa. Are aprons the new bathrobes? Is it possible that they have now replaced the terrycloth robe in the ever more rapidly growing list of things that might make me vomit in my mouth? All signs point to YES.















Oh my god, my strength is sapped. Completely. I need something to give me a boost, I don't know maybe something like a picture of a sexy anthropomorphic unicorn, but there's NO way I'll ever-

OH! Wait a minute!



Phhew! That was close one.